Mike Phirman doesn’t like the Netherlands, but more on that later. Otherwise, Mike Phirman is a very talented musician and comedian seen on Comedy Central and heard throughout “kindie” radio including Sirius XM Kids Place Live as well as several podcasts. Mike Phirman’s new album, “Songs to Sing at Children” will be released, eventually. Mike Phirman took a break from playing piano with his son to join us for an #8isEnoughQuestions interview.

For this #8isEnoughQuestions interview, each of the following questions was written by one of our Full Van Fun family members and answered directly by Mike Phirman. Enjoy!

1. When you sing a song at a child, do they duck or do the songs just smack them in the ear?
Naturally, they duck, but I’ve learned that if you put a reflective surface behind them, the song will bounce off it and, on its way back, smack them in the back of the ears. (This is why all of my music sounds best when it’s behind you.) [Editor’s note – to demonstrate this effect, please place one of your children in front of this screen and play the following song while holding a reflective surface behind their head.]

2. What inspired you to make a song about something that smells bad after you take P.E. class?
Wait… how did you know I’m making a song called “Sticky Stinky Soccer Sock Soup”? [Editor’s note – until “Sticky Stinky Soccer Sock Soup” is released, dance along to this video about something else that smells bad after P.E. – armpits.]

3. Why did you write a song about breakfast, and not lunch or dinner?
I’ve always wanted to make the most important song in the world, so as soon as I heard that breakfast is the most important meal of the day, I knew what I had to do. (Eventually, I will record a song about lunch, followed by one about brunch that’s just a mashup of the two.) [Editor’s note – Mike Phirman’s guide for making breakfast, including a special tip sure to please any ghosts in your household, is presented in the following video.]

4. Is there a person who influenced your success as a musical comedian?
I’m beginning to realize more and more that I was probably influenced less by the ancient Egyptian architect Senenmut, son of Ramose (18th dynasty), and more by “Weird Al” Yankovic, Stevie Wonder, and the Muppets. [Editor’s note – in Mike Phirman’s official bio, he lost his mind when “Weird Al” Yankovic showed up to perform on one of the tracks. Here is that track, from Mike Phirman’s Very Last Songs I Will Ever Record, Part I.]

5. Would you ever write a song about your favorite colors?
Absolutely! I just need to find 20 good rhymes for “mauve”. [Editor’s note – as mauve is the universally recognized color for danger, it is appropriate that it is Mike Phirman’s favorite color.]


Mike “Mauve” Phirman (Photo credit: Mike Phirman)

6. We all have artists/songs that we just don’t like, if you could remove one artist/song from musical history, who would it be and why?
Oh man, I hate to talk badly about anyone, but… I’ll just say what everyone is thinking: history needs to finally forget Unico Willem van Wassenaer, right?! That dude was the WORST! [Editor’s note – the opinions expressed by Mike Phirman are solely his. We, at Full Van Fun, bear no ill will against Dutch composer and nobleman Unico Willem van Wassenaer or the Netherlands. We have included one of Unico Willem’s pleasant concertos so that everyone can experience his music.]

7. Could you rewrite Chicken Monkey Duck to be related to Lord of the Rings? Maybe Frodo Gollum Sam? Hobbit Wizard Elf? Balrog Goblin Orc?
OK, I’ll do it! It’ll be called “Brandybuck Tolkien Took”. It will have only those words, and it will be 9,000 pages long. [Editor’s note – we were unable to get permission from New Line Cinema, Peter Jackson, or the estate of J.R.R. Tolkien to create a corresponding “Brandybuck Tolkien Took” video using Lord of the Rings still pictures of Merry and Pippin along with archival photographs of J.R.R. Tolkien. Instead, we include Mike Phirman’s original video and you can use your imagination.]

8. What is it?
Oh nothing, sorry. I thought I heard something, but it’s probably just Jeff getting his mail. Ok, so… what were we talking about? Socks? [Editor’s note – the correct answers were either “It’s it” per Faith No More “Epic” or “your imagination”. Please enjoy this closing Mike Phirman song about using your imagination and Magic Magic Magic Magic Magic Magic Magic and Waterpark]

Thank you Mike Phirman for a memorable #8isEnoughQuestions interview and we recommend, with hesitation, everyone visit Mike Phirman’s Music Page and watch for his new album “Songs to Sing at Children.”  All joking aside, Mike Phirman’s engaging, humerous, sly, and sentimental songs make the whole family smile. Finally, to correct the record, Mike Phirman bears no ill will toward the Netherlands (at least to our current knowledge). Be sure to check out some of our other #8isEnoughQuestions interviews with artists like Danny Weinkauf of They Might Be GiantsTurkey AndersenLucky Diaz and Alisha GaddisBryan Vander Ark of The Verve Pipe, Play DateRecess MonkeyAndrew and Polly, Greg Page (Original Yellow Wiggle)Rissi Palmer, and Tim Kubart.

Sign up for Full Van Fun's mailing list!

Enter your email address to subscribe to Full Van Fun and receive notifications of new posts by email.